Story of a Writer

And I can start every poem and every sentence with your smile alone. You’re sleeping right now and that’s okay. You don’t sleep enough. You’re always full of worry even if you’re trying to downplay the whole situation – it hurts less if we deny it, right? It only makes sense when we’re doing it right, so I’ve been asking hell if it’s ready for me.

I track the time I spend with you because you’re always there even if I want to be left alone. Sometimes I trust myself, but most nights I just realize that I’m full of shit. Sometimes I love myself, but most nights I realize that I’ve got a long way to go and it’s this thing we call ‘love’ – I’ve had enough of it, I want more of it, I’ve given so much away but I never kept any for myself. They say the writer’s life is bombarded by depression, they were right. They say the writer writes himself into a deep romance between the words of “always kiss me good night and the stars are pretty tonight”, they never write about themselves correctly. Fair enough.

I still break apart this lifeline to find myself in complete fear of myself. I guess time is much needed. Sometimes I forget to love myself, but most nights – the tattoo of you is the closest thing that I have to a reminder of feeling better.

At the end of the day, you fully understand why the most popular metaphor for passion is flame, and you’re ready and willing to do whatever it takes – to keep the light burning as long as you live. It might not be easy, but it’ll definitely be worth it, because you found someone who you know will be by your side for years to come, always.

What does it mean to be a hopeless romantic? It means holding to hope that the love will someday be the only thing that puts you back together. And it’s okay everything is good. Against all logic and all obstacles, love will find it’s way back. Hope is what makes you look outside the window to see if it’s stopped raining. Hope is what makes you believe. Hope is why you get out of the bed in the morning, and why you dream that things can only get better. Hope is what keeps us going.

~ by a writer.


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